How to start a forum.
A forum is a small confidential peer group of entrepreneurs — not a message board. Not Slack. 6 people, including you. You meet once a month.
This is the kit: how to pick the six, a confidentiality agreement you can paste into an email, the monthly agenda, and the update template.
The annual 360 on this site is about 30 minutes per person, once a year. That is not the monthly meeting.
Why I still show up.
One of the most impactful things I’ve done in the past 10 years is join a business forum.
Every month I sit in a room and talk about business and life with about five other entrepreneurs. Same group every time. 100% confidential.
I have multiple groups. Most weeks, for the past 10 years. I’ve been in forums since 2009, through EO.
I’ve sat with people who run popsicle businesses, puzzle companies, woodworking shops, tech companies — you name it. Entrepreneurs have oddly universal problems. I’ve learned something from everyone.
We’ve helped one another navigate failed partnerships, bankruptcies, divorces, fraud, health scares, lawsuits, exits, toxic employees, mental health, deaths in the family, issues with kids. You name it.
Many of my forum mates became my closest friends. The executors of my will are forum mates.
Forum is like group therapy for entrepreneurs under the guise of networking. In reality, we all made better decisions and felt less alone.
Hope it does the same for you.
Andrew
In forums since 2009
How to pick the people.
6 people, including yourself. Entrepreneurs. That’s the whole requirement.
A mix of industries is a feature. The popsicle person and the tech person have the same problems more often than you’d think.
Confidentiality is non-negotiable. If someone treats the room like a networking lunch, they don’t belong.
Meet once a month. Same people. Same room. Years, not a season.
Don’t pick direct competitors if it would kill honesty. You’ll hold back, or they will.
Don’t pick the friends you already vent to if what you need is a new room. A forum is not your existing group chat with a calendar invite.
You are looking for people who will show up and tell the truth.
Start with six. Forum 360’s typical room is 6–10 — about seven. The hard cap is 12. You do not need a bigger group to begin.
A confidentiality agreement they can copy.
Everyone signs before the first meeting. Plain language. Short enough to paste into an email. This is the whole point of the room.
At every meeting, ask this out loud: “Has anyone broken forum confidentiality?”
FORUM CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT We are a forum: six entrepreneurs who meet once a month. What is said in the room stays in the room. By signing, I agree: 1. I will not share what anyone says in forum — not the story, not the name, not a “guess who” version — with anyone outside this group. That includes a spouse, a partner, a colleague, and any other forum I sit in. 2. I will not record meetings or take screenshots. 3. If I keep notes, they cannot identify another member if they left my bag. 4. If I leave the group, this still applies. 5. If I break this, I say so at the next meeting. We decide together what happens. At the start of every meeting we ask: “Has anyone broken forum confidentiality?” Name: ____________________ Date: ____________________ Signature: ____________________
The agenda.
This is the monthly meeting. Icebreaker, the confidentiality check, five-minute updates, then a short focus period. A TIMEKEEPER keeps it honest.
A. Icebreaker (5–10 min)
A light question. Something that gets people talking as people, not as résumés. Then sit down.
B. Confidentiality check (5 min)
Ask, out loud: “Has anyone broken forum confidentiality?” If someone did, you deal with it here. Not later. Not in the parking lot.
C. Five-minute updates (30 min)
Each person gets five minutes. A TIMEKEEPER cuts people off. Equal airtime is the point. Use the update template. Do not let one person eat the hour.
D. Focus period (20 min)
Pick one or two topics from the updates. Clarifying questions, then your own stories. That is Gestalt. Do not give advice. Do not tell them what to do. The full protocol is below.
Gestalt.
Share experiences. Don’t give advice.
This is the most important rule in a YPO or EO-style forum. EO calls it the Gestalt Language Protocol. It is the foundation of Forum. YPO rooms run the same protocol — same trainers, even. Ellie Byrd does EO Forum Training and YPO Forum retreats.
The German word “gestalt” is close to form, or wholeness. In this room it means something specific: the person in the hot seat has the full context. You don’t. You cannot assemble their picture. So you don’t tell them what to do.
It is a communication protocol for the room, not a therapy session. The idea was borrowed from gestalt psychology — context makes the whole — then adapted by EO and YPO into a language rule.
EO’s other two Forum cornerstones sit next to it: confidentiality, and personal responsibility. You own what you say. You own what you decide.
The rules
- 1.
Speak only from your own experience. First-hand. If you didn’t live it, don’t talk.
- 2.
“I” statements. Never “you.”
- 3.
Past tense. What happened, what you did, what you learned. Not what they should do next.
- 4.
No advice. No judgment. No opinion dressed as help.
- 5.
Danger words. Should, would, could, “if I were you,” “you need to,” future-tense instructions.
- 6.
Questions are for understanding, not steering. “How long has this been going on?” is a question. “Have you tried firing them?” is advice with a question mark.
- 7.
If you have no relevant experience, say so and stop. Silence is better than a made-up analogy.
- 8.
The room can interrupt with “Gestalt” when someone slips. That is the point. It is a practiced habit, not a vibe.
Why this exists
Advice creates a hierarchy. I know. You follow. The presenter starts defending instead of thinking.
If they take your advice and it fails, they blame you. If they don’t take it, you sit in judgment. Either way the room gets less honest.
Experience is unarguable. You cannot argue with “when I fired my COO, the team told me they’d been waiting.” You can argue with “you should fire yours.”
When nobody gives advice, there are no debates about the “right” plan. The presenter picks what resonates and owns the decision.
A 2020 Cognitive Research study found that peers sharing information — not directives — is more likely to be internalized. One finding. Not a sermon.
How the room runs it
After updates, pick one person with a real challenge. The hot seat.
Clarifying questions only. Then each person shares a relevant story, a resource they actually used, or empathy. Not a playbook.
The presenter is not required to answer each share or defend. They say what landed.
The timekeeper still cuts people off.
Worked examples
These are examples. Not my life. Not yours. Use them to hear the difference.
Firing someone they love
They say: I’ve known my ops lead for years. Performance is down. Trust is gone. I can’t decide.
Don’t
Document 30 days, bring in HR, fire them on a Friday.
Do
I sat on a similar call for eight months. When I finally let them go, three people on the team told me they’d been waiting. I wished I’d done it sooner. The Friday part only helped me, so I could sit with it over the weekend.
What happens with advice: they cross their arms and explain why your playbook won’t work in their company. The hour dies.
Partnership / legal mess
Don’t
You should sue. You should mediate.
Do
When my partnership blew up I tried mediation first. It bought ninety days. It didn’t save the partnership. The legal path was slower and cleaner.
Another person: I went straight to lawyers. I won. I lost two years and a friendship. Conflicting stories are fine. The presenter chooses.
Veiled advice
Don’t
Have you considered just firing him?
Do
How long has this been going on? What have you already tried?
The first one is still advice. The second two are questions.
No experience
Don’t
A cousin’s story you just invented.
Do
I don’t have a relevant experience.
Then stop.
A template you can copy or print.
Fill this in before you sit down. Rate yourself 1 to 5 — no .5s — on Personal, Family, and Business. One word for how you’re feeling today. Highs and lows in each area. One win from the past month. An energy vampire. The thing you are reluctant to talk about. A challenge to deep-dive with the group. Recommendations at the end.
FORUM UPDATE TEMPLATE 🔢 RATINGS Rate yourself on each area from 1 to 5. 1 = Terrible · 5 = Amazing (No .5 ratings) 🧍 Personal: __ 👨👩👧👦 Family: __ 💼 Business: __ 💭 ONE WORD OPEN Choose a single word to describe how you’re feeling today. __________ ✨ HIGHS & LOWS 🧍 Personal Highs: • Lows: • 👨👩👧👦 Family Highs: • Lows: • 💼 Business Highs: • Lows: • 🏆 ONE SUCCESS / ACCOMPLISHMENT / WIN (PAST MONTH) 🧛 ENERGY VAMPIRE IN MY LIFE RIGHT NOW 🤐 SOMETHING I AM RELUCTANT TO TALK ABOUT 🔍 A CHALLENGE I’D LIKE TO DEEP DIVE ON WITH THE GROUP 🌟 RECOMMENDATIONS FOR THE GROUP Share at the end of forum. 1–3 things you’ve been enjoying lately (restaurants, books, products, podcasts, places, etc.) 1. 2. 3.
How to fill this
This is not a status report. It is so your forum can actually help you.
DO
- Specific: a scene, a number, a decision.
- Write the thing you’d rather skip.
- One Word Open is one word.
- Honest ratings, including 2s.
- One challenge with a real fork.
DON’T
- “Fine,” “busy,” or “grateful.”
- Everything is a 5.
- A list of twelve updates.
- Coaching yourself instead of asking.
- Vague “work-life balance.”
- Using this to dump on a forum member.
EXAMPLE
- RATINGS
- Personal 3 · Family 4 · Business 2
- ONE WORD
- Frayed
- PERSONAL HIGHS
- Morning runs, three weeks in a row.
- PERSONAL LOWS
- Up at 3am twice replaying Tuesday’s board call.
- FAMILY HIGHS
- Saturday with the kids, phone in the other room.
- FAMILY LOWS
- Short with my partner after the close.
- BUSINESS HIGHS
- Closed the enterprise renewal.
- BUSINESS LOWS
- Still haven’t told the team we’re missing plan.
- WIN
- Said no to the advisory that would have eaten Fridays.
- ENERGY VAMPIRE
- The customer who CCs my cell and expects a same-hour reply.
- RELUCTANT
- I’m not sure I want to keep running this company.
- CHALLENGE
- Hire a CEO in the next year, or sell?
- RECOMMENDATIONS
- Lola’s on 4th · Four Thousand Weeks · Acquired
If you already have a room.
When the room exists, run the 360.
The ask is about 30 minutes per person, once a year. $499 per forum per year.
← Back to Forum 360 · Privacy · Terms · support@forum360.app